As this year comes to a close, there is a lot of noise about reflection. About lessons learned. About gratitude. About resolutions and fresh starts.
That pressure does not always fit real life in dementia care.
Some years are not meant to be summarized. Some are meant to be survived.
If you are ending this year with mixed feelings or no clear feelings at all, you are not doing it wrong.
This year may have felt heavy.
Or relentless.
Or quietly manageable in ways that surprised you.
Or steadier than past years, with moments of guilt for noticing that.
All of that belongs here.
You might be feeling angry at how much this year asked of you.
Relieved it is ending.
Guilty for feeling relieved.
Sad for what has changed.
Numb because feeling everything felt like too much.
Proud of yourself and resentful at the same time.
Lonely, even when surrounded by people.
Done explaining yourself.
Or simply tired in a way sleep does not touch.
And you might also be thinking, this year was not the worst. Some things were okay. Some things even felt good.
That is allowed too.
Not every year in dementia care looks the same. A year can be decent and still draining. It can be calmer and still costly. It can hold both ease and grief at the same time.
I’m not living your day to day reality, but I am here for it.
Right now, there is a strong push to make sense of it all. To look back and extract meaning. To choose goals. To set intentions. To decide who you want to be next year.
If that feels grounding to you, you are welcome to do it.
And if it feels like one more demand, you are allowed to opt out.
You do not have to reflect.
You do not have to make resolutions.
You do not have to find a lesson.
You do not have to turn this year into a story that makes sense to anyone else.
You can let the feelings exist without organizing them.
You can let this year end without a conclusion.
You can step into the next one without a plan.
Nothing needs to be fixed today.
Nothing needs to be wrapped up.
Nothing needs to be carried forward if it no longer fits.
You are allowed to leave this year exactly as it is.
If it helps to receive one steady, grounding note each week, you can join my newsletter. No fixing. Just support, perspective, and reminders that you’re not alone.
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Kind truth. Clear steps. Warm guide.
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