If you are looking around right now and noticing what is not done, this is for you.
The cinnamon roll ingredients still on the counter.
The gifts that are not wrapped.
The cards you meant to send.
The meal plan that quietly fell apart.
That tightening in your chest when you think, “I am running out of time”.
That voice that says, “I should be doing more”.
That feeling makes sense.
As the holidays get closer, unfinished things feel louder. The pressure builds. Not because you do not care, but because you care deeply and you are carrying a lot.
Caregiving does not stop for the holidays. Dementia does not adjust to the calendar. And energy does not magically stretch just because there are expectations attached to a date.
So if things are simpler than you planned, that does not mean you dropped the ball.
Sometimes the cinnamon rolls are replaced with cereal because the morning took more out of you than expected. Sometimes gifts stay in their boxes because sleep mattered more. Sometimes dinner comes from the freezer because keeping everyone regulated was already the full job for the day.
That is not something to panic about. It is information.
It tells you where your energy went.
It tells you what mattered.
It tells you that you made choices to get through the day.
You do not need to rush to fix what is unfinished.
You do not need to squeeze more in.
You do not need to turn this into a test you have to pass.
There can be sadness in letting things go. That does not mean you are doing it wrong. It means you are noticing the gap between how you hoped it would look and how it actually looks.
Both can exist.
If today feels messy or incomplete, take a breath. This is not a crisis. It is a moment asking for gentleness, not urgency.
Convenience is not failure. It is often care in its most honest form.
So if your holidays end up quieter, simpler, or different than planned, you are allowed to let that be enough.
And if it helps to hear words that slow things down instead of speeding them up, you are welcome to join my weekly newsletter. It is a place for steady support and honest conversations through seasons like this.
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Kind truth. Clear steps. Warm guide.
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